#nbd

I'm back at it, writing that is.  One of my goals for a while now has been to get back on the blog and jot down a few words.  Here I am.  Hello! So, what has happened in my life in the past year or so? Only a complete and total career change, that's all. No big deal...

I was at church last Sunday night for the first time in ages and I saw my Priest. "Hi Natalie! So good to see you.  How have you been? Are you still working at the Y? Oh no, that's right you aren't at the Y anymore. Are you still at Gulu Gulu? No? Oh, so what are you up to these days?" His questions were kind but telling.  I have gone through a TON of change over the past few years and church attendance has certainly been spotty so it makes sense that he wouldn't be up to date.

"I've discovered the wonderful world of health care!" I say, almost too enthusiastically. You see, I am on the path to becoming a nurse.  Nurse Natalie; it has a good ring to it! This is a life changing decision and I couldn't be more thrilled, but this path has not been easy. I am making it work, one day at a time, but I am as busy as ever working 3 jobs to make ends meet. I have learned what hard work truly looks like.

I started work as a Certified Nurse Aide this past January and worked at a nursing home for about 6 months.  I almost didn't make it.  I have no idea how people spend an entire career as a CNA, especially working, as I was, with dementia patients.  The pay is awful and the work is back breaking. Some of my coworkers were quite difficult to work with and my patients were all elderly people at the end of their lives.  End of life care is NOT glamorous. These patients rely completely on the nursing staff for all of their daily needs.  It is so difficult to see day in and day out. I wish I could say that I am cut out for that work, but I am not.  I did the job to the best of my abilities but when the doors opened to a new job in a hospital, I jumped at the opportunity.

Now I work 55-60 hours a week instead of 75-80 but I am still struggling to find balance with it all.  I still work 3 jobs and try to find time for my boyfriend, my dog, my friends, my family, and ME! Me time - what a novel idea. And on top of it all, I'm headed back to school in January to start on my prerequisite classes for nursing school. EEK! Burnout and failure seem to be creeping into the scene.  As my mother says, "If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail." So fear not my friends, I have a plan. As some of you may know, I LOVE lists!!!! So, as per usual, I have made many. And as a precaution, I have put a disclaimer at the top of each one.

Don't be hard on yourself if all of this doesn't happen

This helps me rejoice in the little things. "I checked one thing off the list today." Or "I am one step closer to checking that big ticket item off the list." And sometimes, "I didn't check anything off the list today but I was productive in other ways." Little victories. Little victories that get you through each day and remind yourself, I'm doing ok.  I still have a long road ahead, for my career and for me personally, but looking back on the past year and seeing how far I've come, I'm encouraged.  Change is terrifying but it can also be extremely exciting. No big deal...